I never dreamed I would ever say I am sick of Casual. Because Casual, in the good old days, was great because it was a welcome change from the way of life that was normal for us and everyone in the civilized world. By normal I mean meals eaten on plates, at a table, with good manners and attire appropriate to the occasion. I always thought Casual meant informal and relaxed but still required good table manners and wearing shoes.

Sadly, normalcy has disappeared from the American scene and Casual has taken over.   Since the Casual approach has become the norm, the word Casual has been overused as much as genre, dysfunctional and challenged.

Casual clothes, meals, entertaining, attitudes, furniture, décor, houses and even people. Unbelievably, Casual is regarded as the preferred way of life.  To hear people rhapsodize about how very Casual they are, it is hard to avoid noting that they are smug about disregarding accepted mores and folkways. By proclaiming their casualness, they are warning that they are rude and thoughtless.

My mother, who was always right, could only be Casual in a limited way.   Mama would sometimes unbend to the extent that she would plan and serve a Casual al fresco summer lunch.  That meant to her, and therefore to me, delicious things served on a lettuce leaf with iced tea and a fruit compote. She never cared much for picnics, somehow she found the woods far too unpredictable.  But she liked to serve meals, weather permitting, on the porch or under a shady tree in the back yard.

Casual now means a meal where everything is fast food and afterward everything can be thrown away including the plates and the forks.  Knives and spoons are rarely provided.  The new fork, a dangerous utensil, is rounded (for use as a spoon) with sharp sides (for use as a knife) and points on the end for use as a fork, if you survive the other features.

Casual clothing in my mother’s day, and in mine, meant sandals and shorts in the summer and loafers and slacks in the winter.  Today, Casual clothing is extremely expensive with a designer label and consists of a scrap of cloth that does not quite cover the midriff to say nothing of the backriff, worn with ragged jeans cut off below the pockets for all seasons.  No matter how bitterly cold or blazing hot: the same getup is worn.

Look, I am not Anti-Casual.  Far from it.  I want to restore it to its former place. A change from formal meals and dress. Casual meals that are wonderfully simple, and delicious.  Casual clothing that is comfortable and covers the more important body parts and casual entertaining that is spontaneous and fun.

What I have observed over the past few years is that being Casual has undergone a metamorphosis and it now equates to Not giving A Hoot – or whatever it is that people don’t give when they have little interest in the effect their attitude or fashion statement has on other people.

College students say they deserve at least a B simply because they show up at most of their classes.  Forget tests, their mere presence should be enough in this casual age. They cannot understand why professors won’t let them make up an exam they did not bother to show up to take.  

Young people are not the only group suffering from narcissism (love of self).  My father blamed all that was wrong with the world on Dr. Spock back in the 50s who preached that children had to have excessive praise, never hear the word “no” and be instilled with a belief in their entitlement to everything. The confidence of children was definitely built up, but also fostered a generation of self-indulgent Casual Citizens.

The one bright spot in the recession is it may force Casual Citizens of all ages in a free fall economy to take a look at how they have wasted money in the past and wish they had it all back safe in their bank account.  It could cure Casual Citizens of their sense of economic privilege. 

Somehow, a feeling of self-importance impacts on every aspect of life.  Rudeness to clerks in stores, waitresses in restaurants and all others who are a part of the service we receive daily.  Casual Citizens are dismissive of the rules of behavior and dress as antediluvian and any disagreement with their radical opinions is viewed with suspicion as
anarchy or at the very least a sure sign of insanity.   

As a direct result of all the mindless devotion to being Casual, those of us left floundering in the wake of such rudeness of manner and attitude have a new status:

We are called Casualties